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Diah is here! Mom of three boys.

Friends From Childhood to Adult Life

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Hi, assalamu alaikum.

A friend is somebody who understands us. This person could be someone who lives close to us, or could be so far away.

My first friend I remember is my sister and brother. Of course. After them I have a nice friend from my childhood. She used to be my neighbour. She lived on the same block.

I went to kindergarten with her. She is a brave and full of confident girl. I learnt a lot from her. She is sooo nice and helpful. I don't know why but perhaps she is the youngest child in the family so she was happy to have me as a little sister. She is 4 months older than me.

We went to different elementary and high school but we are still friends up to now. She lives in Surabaya now with her family.

My best friends in school years were sooo nice. We still keep in touch with each other through social media or Whats App. 

Things have changed but the memories stay the same. 

I also have a penpal back in my college years. She is a Japanese girl named Kyoko. She used to live in Okayama at the moment. And October 15 is her birthday. 

I have no new friends now. Well, my husband and sons are mine bff. But since I got married and moved to Madiun, I don't have any close female friend. In opposite, my sons do have a good friend of theirs.

It is understandable because things are not the same anymore. We have our own family and business and, yeah, secret.

People say when you got married, you must hide your secret from the world. That is true!

A married person can not have a very close friend beside their partner. We have issues in marriage life from money issues to children. And those things are not meant to be shared wirh other people outside our family. Even to our own siblings. 

In some cases, yes there are things we can share. But not with the most important things. Like how much is our salary and debt. Or how many times we have yelled to our kids. Oops.

Things like those are for us only. And it is likely to happen a person could talk about it to his/her close friend if their bond is too strong.

I once complained to a friend. I said to her, "How could a married person forget her old friend?"

She answered, "It is not like what you thought. We have a new life that we can't share to other people."

I couldn't take what she meant at that time but later when I have married I do understand it better.

We need friends, yes. But when it comes to family life, friends should stay outside. 

Diah Dwi Arti
Diah Dwi Arti
Muslimah | Madiun, Indonesia | Mom of three | email: diah.d.arti [at]

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